Simeon his [Rabban Gamaliel’s] son said: All my life I have been brought up among the sages, and I have found nothing better for a person than silence; study is not the most important thing but practice; and whoever talks too much brings about sin. [Ethics of the Fathers I.17, trans. by Philip Birnbaum].
In the biblical book Ecclesiastes, traditionally attributed to Solomon, we are told there is “a time to keep silence, and a time to speak.” In my previous blog, I wrote about the power of silence and a dispute between two rabbis concerning its use. One of the Rabbis observed Yom HaShoah (International Holocaust Remembrance Day) by refraining from speech and maintaining silence in the sanctuary of his synagogue. He invited members of his congregation to join him there. The other Rabbi believed that remaining silent on Yom HaShoah was a desecration, not a fitting commemoration of the remembered events. The silence of many Germans and the world’s nations concerning the Nazis and their atrocities was a serious moral lapse. In this blog, I will address the use of silence for spiritual reasons.
A German filmmaker named Philip Gröning requested permission from the Carthusian order of Catholic monks in 1984 to make a documentary about their lifestyle. It took sixteen years for the order to grant him access. His film, ” Into Great Silence,” released in 2005, provides a unique and intimate look into the daily routines and rituals of the monks, who live lives of extreme austerity, prayer, and silence. The film captures the peaceful and meditative atmosphere of the monastery, unveiling the monks’ profound spiritual devotion and connection to the natural world. “Into Great Silence” is visually stunning, a reflective experience that encourages us to ponder the ideas of solitude, spirituality, and finding meaning in life. The film’s slow pace and minimalistic approach allow us to fully immerse ourselves in the contemplative way of life of the monks.
What interested me most about the monks’ way of life was their use of silence for spiritual reasons. Monks who follow the Carthusian tradition of monasticism employ silence as a central and distinctive spiritual practice. The primary use of silence as a spiritual practice in Carthusian monastic life is to create an environment conducive to deep contemplation, communion with God, and detachment from the world’s distractions. It is a means to nurture the interior life of the monks. I am a Jew. We don’t have monks. But as a Jew, I am profoundly interested in leading a spiritual life, drawing closer to God, and not being distracted by the world. As part of the morning and evening prayer services, I recite the Shema. In the third paragraph, God warns us to keep mindful of all the commandments and to do them and “not stray after your heart and after your eyes, after which you go whoring.” [Robert Alter translation]. Strong words!
So, after seeing the movie for the second time, I decided to try incorporating silence as a spiritual practice into my life. But how to do it? I’m married, live in a non-monastic community, and have friends, guests, and visitors to my home. I did what all married men do in cases like this: I asked my wife. Together, we drew up some rules and guidelines, if you will, about how I could begin the practice of silence. Here’s what we came up with.
- We allow fifteen minutes, usually in the morning, for planning our day’s agenda. We talk about things we need to do and when to do them.
- Emergencies: of course, I can, indeed must, speak during an emergency.
- Talking is appropriate, polite, and expected when visitors or guests are in our home or I am in someone else’s home.
- On the Sabbath or Festivals, there are no restrictions on speech.
- I enter what we call The Great Silence, from 1830 in the evening until 0700 the following morning. During this time, insofar as possible, I maintain strict silence. Part of this time, of course, is spent sleeping.
That’s the plan. How’s it going? We are into our fourth week, and my wife is very pleased with my silence. That’s no big surprise. I think many people would appreciate a little more silence from their spouses. It’s hard to have an argument when one partner is silent. That’s a real benefit. In addition, my wife tells me that I have become a better listener and that when I speak, I respond more to what she has said. That’s her side. What does it look like from my side?
So far, I have found the practice of silence incredibly powerful, enriching my prayer life and constantly placing me in the “now.” For example, when I do my chores, I’m not thinking about hurrying through them. I’m not sure I understand how any of this works, only how it feels. I feel less anxious, less worried, less critical. Someone with more experience with silence might know why. But right now, that does not seem important to me. I’m enjoying the practice of silence.
On the Sabbath, as part of the morning prayers, we recite Psalm 19. My silence has helped me better understand what the Psalmist says in the following verses, translated by Robert Alter.
The heavens tell God’s glory,
and His handiwork sky declares.
Day to day breathes utterance
and night to night pronounces knowledge.
There is no utterance and there are no words,
their voice is never heard.
Through all the earth their voice goes out,
to the world’s edge, their words.
Notice these words: tell, declares, utterance, pronounces, voice.
Now notice these: no words, never heard.
The earth speaks of God’s glory without ever uttering a word but just by being. I hope I, too, may grow to tell of God’s glory, not by my speech but by my silence, not by my talking but by my being.
If you are Jewish and fasting this evening and tomorrow, may you have an easy fast, and may 5784 be a year of growth and happiness for you.
All the best,
Gershon
Gershon Ben-Avraham 